Mr. Sensitive

August 23, 2013

Worst. Commercial. Ever.

Filed under: Uncategorized — lbej @ 13:00

You probably know the commercial.  It starts with several middle-aged (I’m being kind) couples doing middle-aged, domestic things–gardening, cooking, watching their kids play Little League baseball–while being playful and generally, modestly affectionate.  Now the voice-over kicks in:

“She loves a lot of the same things you do.  That’s why you love her.”

Well, sure.

“But your erectile dysfunction?  Well, you know that could be a question of blood flow.”

Excuse me?

There are several versions of this commercial.  Another one goes like this:

“You make a great team.  It’s been that way since the day you met.”

Okay, no problems there.

“But your erectile dysfunction?  Well, you know that could be a question of blood flow.”

What the hell?

Who wrote these commercials?  There’s no transition, not even a half-hearted attempt.

How about this instead?

“Hey old dude!  Do you want the rock-hard dong of a twenty-year-old, but you have qualms about organ theft?  Ask your doctor about Cialis.”

I hate these commercials.  As men and women–as conscientious human beings–can we all come together and agree that commercials for impotence drugs (and maxi pads, while we’re at it) have no place on television?  I was watching CNBC at lunch the other day, and nine-year-old Reagan was sitting at the table when one of the Cialis commercials came on.  (To give you some context If you don’t watch CNBC, impotence pills are advertised as heavily on that channel as feminine  products are on Lifetime.)  Reagan missed the blood flow line, but she was evidently all ears when voice-over guy gave us this dire warning: “If you have an erection lasting longer than four hours, seek medical help immediately.”  My daughter heard that, turned to me, and asked, “Daddy, what’s an erection?”

Goddamn it, Pfizer.

(Yes, I know Pfizer makes Viagra, not Cialis, but Eli Lilly just didn’t sound right to me in that moment.)

Leaving aside that the fact that a sixty-year-old body doesn’t function the same way as a twenty-year old body isn’t a ‘question of blood flow’ so much as it is a ‘fact of life,’ these commercials are horrible.  This is horrible, corporate America.  Janet Jackson’s nip slip causes a national uproar, but my daughter can hear about some old man’s four-hour erection in every commercial block on any and every channel the media companies tell the drug companies Baby Boomers might watch?  I’m ready for football to start, but am I ready to hit the mute button every time the game goes to commercial?  For my daughters’ sake, I’d better be.

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4 Comments »

  1. Amen.

    Comment by jofjltncb6 — October 29, 2013 @ 20:46 | Reply

  2. +1

    Comment by gleapman — December 22, 2013 @ 15:08 | Reply

  3. YES! Our kids should not be exposed to this subject matter. And the Cialis commercials, with their non-sequiturs, just show that even the company doesn’t know of a right way to bring the subject up. “The weatherman says it’ll rain tomorrow. But your erectile dysfunction? That has nothing to do with the weather.”

    Comment by netgk — January 14, 2014 @ 22:51 | Reply

  4. I absolutely agree with your sentiments – which is how I found this webpage, but your erectile dysfunction?………..

    Comment by Mo — September 17, 2014 @ 21:45 | Reply


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