Mr. Sensitive

May 13, 2012

Yard Dominion of the Spiders – Governmental Primer

Filed under: Uncategorized — lbej @ 20:43

The Yard Dominion of the Spiders was formed as a federal union consisting of three republics: Back Yard, Front Yard, and Basement.  Elections to the Dominion Senate were and are based on population; in addition, there is a Control Council to which each constituent republic provides a member.  The Control Council must confirm legislation passed by the Senate before it becomes Dominion law.  This constitutional structure was adopted during the long period of dissipation within the Pfaff Indoor Empire; I don’t know the exact date of ratification, but I would estimate sometime circa 2005, 2006 at the latest.  Initially, the demands of the aggressive Basement spiders for more influence in foreign policy led to the constitutional split between Front and Back Yards as a way for the outdoor spiders to lend institutional permanence to the 2-to-1 anti-war majority (earlier Dominion constitutions had not formalized the division between Front and Back).    Over the next several years, however, the all-weather success of the Basement spiders and the desire of the Front Yard to extend control over the porch area moved the latter into the pro-war camp and a more provocative policy of infiltration prevailed in the Control Council.  Nevertheless, as is clear in the table below, the Back Yard still held the majority of seats in the Senate, resulting in frequent clashes between the two bodies.

State Pop. Area
Back yard 55% 45%
Front yard 20% 30%
Basement 25% 25%

When the revivification of the Indoor Empire began in 2009, the Yard Dominion was too internally divided even to perceive the change; a coherent policy response was inconceivable.

In March 2010, I declared war on the Dominion and invaded the Basement Republic.  The Front Yard favored a multi-front assault against the Empire in support of the Basement; however, the large majority of Back Yard spiders believed that the Basement had provoked the Imperial attack and that the Back Yard should avoid committing troops as long as possible.  After a few early setbacks, Imperial forces swiftly gained ascendancy in the Basement War; the combination of Back Yard-Basement antipathy and the deteriorating military position of the Basement created a diplomatic opening I swiftly exploited.  Bypassing the Front Yard—not truly in a position to provide direct aid to the Basement—I negotiated a secret non-aggression pact with the Back Yard.  This extinguished the final hope for the Basement spiders; less than a week later I cleared the last webs out of the garages and the future Apple Floor Room and declared a state of debellation over the former Basement Republic.

The Imperial conquest of the basement threw the Yard Dominion into political chaos, especially when the complicity of the Back Yard was revealed (not by me, I swear).  The government fell and a new constitution was drafted to reflect the post-war reality.  The peace treaty between the Dominion and the Empire ending the Basement War ceded 90 percent of the territory formerly held by the Basement Republic to the Empire; I immediately annexed and occupied the ceded territory.  The new constitution preserved the three-state structure:  the entirely new Central Spider Republic, consisting of territories transferred from the Front Yard (driveway, porch) and Back Yard (patio, deck); the South Spider Republic (the rest of the Back Yard); and the North Spider Republic (the rest of the Front Yard).

State Pop. Area
South 50% 55%
North 30% 35%
Central 20% 10%

So now you know.

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