Mr. Sensitive

January 25, 2012

State of the Union

Filed under: Uncategorized — lbej @ 10:40

I didn’t watch the State of the Union address on Tuesday.  I voted for President Obama in 2008 and I’ll vote for him again this year, but I can’t stand to listen to him.  His cadence is maddening.  I just want to scream at him, “Punctuation means pause!  If there’s no punctuation then FINISH THE SENTENCE!”  He must drive his speechwriters crazy with the nonsensical pauses.  Also, what is he looking at?  Half the time he’s looking up and off to one side or the other, not like he’s avoiding eye contact with the camera or the audience, but like he’s making eye contact with THE FUTURE.  You want to talk about the future, that’s fine, but stop talking to the future.  It can’t hear you because IT DOESN’T EXIST YET.  You’re not going to be president of anything when it gets here if you don’t stop talking to it before it arrives.  I did watch some of the Wednesday morning coverage on CNBC, though, and the fact that it was sparse and grudging leads me to believe that the President did pretty well.  They’d have had mock-ups of him in front of a hammer and sickle wearing a Lenin beard if he’d given them anything to work with.  It also causes the CNBC anchors obvious, physical pain that an aggressively progressive ‘millionaires’ tax’ is being championed by Warren Buffet.  Buffet is a part of CNBC’s three-personed God of Business, along with Steve Jobs and Jack Welch.  Now they’ve lost Jobs literally and Buffet conceptually, and Welch looks more like a goblin with each passing day.  He still hates poor people, but his face suggests he should be bashing down the gates of Minas Tirith instead of bashing Democratic politicians.

Quick quiz: which one is Jack Welch and which one is Gothmog from Return of the King?



  1. Oh my god. You got him. The resemblance is uncanny.

    Comment by Charlotte — January 25, 2012 @ 10:45 | Reply

  2. Wow. He might be the most orcish man in the world.

    Comment by Justin — January 25, 2012 @ 15:51 | Reply

  3. I didn’t watch, either. Four years ago, I was borderline obsessed (“borderline” means “over the borderline”) with the election. Now, I’m just burned out. People are idiots, and politics is run by people and for people, so I have thrown the baby out with the bathwater. And the bathwater was poison? I don’t know. You nailed Obama’s delivery pretty much perfectly. He is talking to the future, and his cadence is alien cadence.

    Comment by Marcus — January 25, 2012 @ 18:06 | Reply

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