Mr. Sensitive

April 13, 2010

Operation Lilypad Postponed

Filed under: Operation Lilypad — lbej @ 21:01

Conference of the chiefs of staff for the service branches held this Monday and Tuesday.  Decision was taken to postpone the invasion of the pond and environs, codenamed Operation Lilypad, indefinitely or until such time as a coalition of the willing can be assembled to undertake the perilous mission.  I would be willing to provide troop strength and considerable logistical support and war materiel.  But I am not confident in my ability to serve as Généralissime for such a campaign.  I have a complicated relationship with the yard spiders, to say the least.  I think that only Zero could pull off this particular command.  I would promote him to général de corps d’armée so that he could command the Yard Expeditionary Force (subject of course to my overall suzerainty).  Perhaps my sister could coax the honored général out of retirement once more.  I believe some short pants could obtained for the campaign.

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4 Comments »

  1. I would enlist. I lack the expertise for any advanced rank, but I’m pretty tireless in the sun.
    I could dedicate a week in July. Shorter periods before then if an earlier invasion becomes necessary.

    Comment by Justin — April 13, 2010 @ 21:59 | Reply

    • Excellent. I will also need some engineering assistance. The primary issue, though, especially acute by a July timeframe, is spiders. Specifically, the potential for touching them. If a big one gets on me I might lose it and declare war on the entire yard, and then we’re back to the fire option, and Katie will be mad. So I will need soldiers who don’t panic if they encounter large spiders, as I do. I am good for lifting and digging and also, I believe, for strategy, but not for touching of spiders. In the garage I could bomb the hell out of everything until all spiders other than heavily-armored black widows were dead, and I can’t do that outside. You see my dilemma.

      Comment by lbej — April 14, 2010 @ 07:33 | Reply

  2. I pointed Zero to this entry, and he immediately started researching, so I’m sure he’ll be happy to have a look at things and talk to you when we visit this weekend.

    Comment by charlotte — April 14, 2010 @ 17:48 | Reply

    • Double excellent. I hereby appoint Zero deputy commander of Supreme Headquarters Aquatic Expeditionary Force (SHAEF) with the rank of général de brigade. Congratulate him for me.

      Comment by lbej — April 14, 2010 @ 17:56 | Reply


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