Mr. Sensitive

April 30, 2010

I Regret You Have But One Life To Give For Your Country

Filed under: Basement War — lbej @ 16:17
Tags: ,

I uncovered this creature cleaning off the patio adjacent to the basement today.

She’s on the side of the racket right beside SHOCK if you can’t see her.  I can’t figure out how to use Katie’s camera to zoom in on things, or else it sucks.  I knocked her off the racket–no touching, of course–and I exhorted her to get off the patio and away from the house where the children play.  I gave her two hours, but when I came back I found her under the grill.  In the end, the outcome was inevitable.

C’est la guerre.  Some challenges cannot be declined.  And yes, that is a red hourglass on the abdomen, if you can’t quite make it out.  I hate this camera.

Fire

Filed under: Stuff I Just Wanted To Say — lbej @ 09:37

If the answer isn’t fire, you’re asking the wrong question.

April 29, 2010

Busted

Filed under: Comic Books — lbej @ 18:26

Sale at comic book store today.  Here’s the score:

  • Agent X #14, paid $1.50
  • Amazing Spider-Man #430, paid $2.50 (what?)
  • Amazing Spider-Man #431, paid $2.50 (double what?)
  • Amazing Spider-Man #529 (2nd print), paid $4
  • Astonishing X-Men (vol. 3) #2, paid $2
  • Astonishing X-Men (vol. 3) #3, paid $2
  • Batman #233 (in VG), paid $2.50
  • Batman #663, paid $1.50
  • Battle Chasers #7 (Ramos cover), paid $1.25
  • Cable #75, paid $4
  • Daredevil #372, paid $2
  • Detective Comics #530 (in VF), paid $1.50
  • Green Lantern (current series) #8 (Adams variant), paid $2.50
  • Green Lantern (current series) #26, paid $1.50
  • Green Lantern (current series) #36 (2nd print), paid $1.50
  • House of Secrets #83 (in GD), paid $1.50
  • House of Secrets #97 (in GD), paid $1.50
  • Incredible Hulk #93, paid $2
  • Incredible Hulk #94, paid $2.50
  • Incredible Hulk #95, paid $2.50
  • Incredible Hulk #96, paid $2
  • Peter Parker Spider-Man #25 (Spidey cover), paid $4
  • Punisher (vol. 3, 1995-1996) #11, paid $1.50
  • Rob Zombie’s Spookshow (Crossgen) #1, paid $4
  • Spawn #111, paid $1.50
  • Spawn #134, paid $2.50
  • Spawn #140, paid $2.50
  • Spawn #144, paid $1.25
  • Spawn #147, paid $2.50
  • Spawn #148, paid $2.50
  • Spawn #149, paid $2.50
  • Spawn #151 (Spawn cover), paid $1.25
  • Spawn #152, paid $1.25
  • Spawn #153, paid $2.50
  • Spawn #154, paid $2.50
  • Spawn #155, paid $2.50
  • Spawn #165, paid $2.50
  • Superman’s Pal Jimmy Olsen #67 (in GD), paid $1.50
  • Teen Titans (vol. 3) #2 (2nd print), paid $2
  • Thor (vol. 2) #34, paid $1.50
  • Thor (vol. 2) #35, paid $1.50
  • Thor (vol. 2) #81-85, paid $1.50 each
  • Titans #50, paid $1.25
  • X-Men (vol. 2) #100 (Yu regular cover), paid $2
  • X-Men (vol. 2) #100 (JR Jr. cover), paid $2.50

Axiom And Corollary

Filed under: House,Stuff I Just Wanted To Say — lbej @ 18:07

Axiom: if you don’t want paint on something, you are going to want to go ahead and not get paint on it.  Corollary: if you are thinking you can just get the paint off later, you are going to want to not think that.

April 28, 2010

Promotion of Jenny

Filed under: Girls,Imperial Army — lbej @ 19:18
Tags:

Jenny was responsible for a burst of unforced cleaning this afternoon, and I am promoting her to chef de division (colonel) with a view towards elevating her to the general staff.  This is the second time she has taken the initiative to aid my housekeeping efforts, and she supervised Brittan when I was painting the front door two days ago.  She’s also been more considerate of her mother lately.  I have been very impressed with Jenny, and I am also beginning to think I’m going to need a new chief of staff fairly soon.  Général Katie has been somewhat erratic of late, and she struggles with in-theater chain of command.  She may be the sole breadwinner, but I will not be told when and how to kill things.

Basement War – I Crossed The Yalu And I Didn’t Know It

Filed under: Basement War — lbej @ 18:54

The BEF pushed out from the rear of KS and MS Garage in simultaneous flanking maneuvers with a goal of driving dirt, leaves, crusted oil, gum (at least ten pieces), and spider bits out through the doors, across the driveway, and ultimately into the grass on the far side.  1st and 2nd Broom divisions performing well until the unexpected intervention of the wind.  Huge and sudden reversal effected as the wind lifted all the filth into the air in a shocking vortex that swirled throughout both sides of the garage.  Entire Broom Corps routed and dessicated spider eyes blown into my eyes, probably.  Fortunately I had a powerful force in reserve–an entire Leaf Blower Army.  I sent the troops forward and drove the detritus up and out, creating a virtual wall of airborne biomass suspended between the two armies.  “You think you’re the wind?” I screamed.  “I am the wind!”  I swear this happened and it was as awesome as you think.  I moved deftly between garages and closed first one door and then the other, a monstrous gale shrieking against my triumph.  I had won.  Then I went out into the driveway to complete the push to the grass, but as I had been forced to close the garage doors I was unable to extend the voltage supply lines I would need to support a Leaf Blower army.  I had to call on the brooms again and it took another 45 minutes to finish the job.  Ultimately I found myself sweeping frantically in between gusts, shoving the filth heap against the fence to the right of the garage before guiding it gingerly along the narrow windbreak it provided.  Again and again the wind drove me back, but I made steadily more and more progress with each ebb.  In the end, I achieved my narrow aim of sweeping the garage and driving the mess far enough away that it can’t just blow right back in every time I take the car out.  But I learned a hard lesson as well.  If Mao says don’t cross the Yalu, don’t cross the Yalu.  Or get a gas-powered leaf blower.

Basement War – Ambush

Filed under: Basement War — lbej @ 06:08

Outflanked and hammered by mutinous nagging.  Naggery repulsed at considerable cost in strength and momentum.  Hopefully a steak sandwich and some Cheerwine will help.

Third Basement War – I Have A Secret Weapon

Filed under: Basement War — lbej @ 03:09

Now witness the firepower of this fully armed and operational leaf blower!

Third Basement War Begins

Filed under: Basement War — lbej @ 03:05

When the final history of this conflict is written, I believe it will be seen as a series of wars similar to the Punic Wars between Rome and Carthage.  The first Basement War, chronicled in detail already, was the War against the Spiders (the infestation itself as well as its refuse infrastructure).  The second Basement War, now nearly complete (though not entirely) is the War against Junk.  The Battle of Bulk Pickup waged this past Sunday and Monday was the defining battle of the second Basement War.  I still have to attack the reserve refrigerator in the unfinished room and bring it to heel before this second phase of the broader conflict can be considered over; that is easier said than done, as I will describe when I am preparing to launch the assault Thursday evening.  The third Basement War begins this morning.  This time I will blister the basement with excoriating cleanliness on a such a scale as has never before been attempted in the history of the Pfaff.  I don’t know what awaits me; it may be that I will rouse ancient creatures that have slumbered in the darkness since the foundation itself was laid.  I shall keep my wits about me, of course, and I’ve yet to meet a creature that much cared for a punch in the face or bleach in the eyes.  First things first: a second cup of coffee and the dishes from last night.

April 27, 2010

Friction Of War

Filed under: Basement War — lbej @ 17:34

I have been losing momentum this week, suffering from the effects of what Clausewitz described as Reibung (friction).  The essence is that trying hard is hard.  Paradoxically, the only solution to the naturally deleterious effect of effort is to put forth more effort.  I’m getting up at 4 a.m. is what I’m doing.

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